Either He's Going to Kill Himself... Or I'm Going to Kill Him

You're probably thinking, "Oh jeez... Who is she going to kill today? Her husband? Her brother? Her Father-in-law?" We all know the later guess is the most likely to be correct, but if you thought, "Holden," you'd actually BE correct.

I will take girls over boys any day. ANY DAY!!!!!! I only have one boy and he is the biggest pain in my ass. I have more gray hairs from that little shit than all the other kids combined. Maybe it's not the fact that he's a boy; maybe it's just his personality. I don't know; I don't care. He drives me ape-shit. Constantly clinging to me, constantly whining, constantly crying, constantly destroying, constantly CLIMBING and putting himself in peril. Now I know why he's so cute. If he wasn't he'd already be strangled, Bart Simpson style.

Over the weekend Holden started climbing up the slide on the Kangaroo Climber and mastered sliding back down all by himself. Which was awesomely cute while there was two parents here. Today he's started climbing up the slide, and jumping off the Kangaroo Climber's walls, or crawling onto the play kitchen, and of course, falling off the counter tops. Sometimes on top of his sisters, sometimes into the dishes, whatever.

If he makes it to next Wednesday he'll be a year old. Who knows what can actually happen in a week though. Just look what he's been up to today:

I've said it before and I'll say it again: That kid is going to be the death of me!!

Update: After I posted this all yesterday, it got worse... I tried moving things around and thought it did the trick. I was wrong. Pretty soon Holden will be leaping talls buildings in a single bound. Here's the evidence:

Happy as a pig in shit, standing at the tippy-top most point.

As seen here, clinging on for dear life while hanging off the kitchen.

Can he stand up in the kitchen while standing on the stove? It's worth a shot... nope!

It didn't work the first time... Hey but why not try again!? Danger is his middle name.

I thought I was so fucking SMART moving the kitchen and Kangaroo Climber away from each other. Well, he showed me! I'm not smart, he's just fearless. Seen here spanning the gap between his two newfound loves.

Nothing fancy, just a close up of his crazy ass.

Oh, what's the matter, Holden, did you fall???? Awww... Poor Baby! No one saw that one coming; maybe you should learn a lesson from all this.

Seeing as how he couldn't reach the kitchen he decided the couch would be just as good. With all the electronics behind it especially!! "Hi Mom!"

This morning I re-thought the whole set-up while we were feeding bottles. The first thing Holden did after he got up was climb up the slide and make for the top of the kitchen. Instead, I swapped their places, turned the kitchen lengthwise along the couch to put extra room between it and the Kangaroo Climber, and moved the climber over as shown. So far it's worked, but we'll see how long it takes for him to lunge at the TV. ARGH!

Much love,